God Punishes Singapore With Blackout For Trying To Repeal 377A

ate last night, whilst most Singaporeans were asleep in their beds, our Lord sent forth a plague of darkness to shroud the lands of Jurong, Woodlands and Ang Mo Kio.

For hours, those who were awake binge-watching Yanxi Palace lived in peril, for fear their mobile devices might yet die.

There was much wailing and gnashing of teeth, as they beseeched of the lord: “Why art thou wroth? Why did you strike down our power outlets and leave us in this barren place, a wilderness without the season finale?”

And the Lord spake: “Because I saw you guys sharing a 377A repeal petition on Facebook last week, and I def remember saying you shall not lie with a man as with a woman, and nor shall you heart FB comments saying it’s okay.”

These words pleased not the sinners, who asked: “Why us? India started it first and they never kena blackout.”

No voice was heard in the darkened realm, until thirty minutes hath passed. And the lord being merciful, answered: “Okay fine, let there be light.”

And there was light.

But not before saying unto his people:  “But you should be sleeping anyway. You have work tomorrow.”